Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages believes “Each person has a primary love language that we must learn to speak if we want that person to feel loved.” Learning these different terms and how to properly use them can help strengthen your marriage.
Your partner and yourself need verbal expressions to feel loved, sexy and hear words that are affirming. Saying loving things or doing something sexy for your partner can be difficult. Letting your guard down creates intimacy and a safe space for the both of you to express your deepest feelings without any shame. Agree on some ground rules and go from there. Remember, your partner is not here to judge you but to love you.
When we are born our first sense is touch. The way a mother communicates her affection is through touch. Not much has changed as we got older. We are programmed to desire touch. Physical affection is indispensable for the overall pleasure and satisfaction of a romantic relationship. It is what bonds us to one another. Some may need to be touched more than others and the opposite can be true as well. To find out how much is just enough or too much, talk to your partner. Throughout the week, touch your partner more than you would or less, to see their reaction. Besides increasing intimacy, being touched often by your loved one can help reduce conflict within a marriage.
Acts of service
Take note of the manners of your partner when using different words and behaviors. Find that elicit feeling of love and affection and remember the actions that produced such reactions from your partner. Simple sweet comments, a smile or how the tea is made can feel like a generous gesture. It is regularly the small things that we appreciate most that make us feel valued and cherished. These acts of service towards one another can be clarified for yourself and your partner.
Everyone enjoys presents, but what we really care about is the thought that went behind it. A gift does not have to be a material item. It can be noticing that your loved one enjoys knitting and seem to always run out of a particular yarn. Simply by going out and buying back ups and giving this to them will mean the world. It will show you notice them. For some, something as telling your partner you love them every day can hold so much worth. A marriage is about giving and receiving. If you give, the marriage can receive so much.
In this age of technology, we can be worlds apart despite being in the same room with each other. Quality time is different for everyone. For some people, quality time is sitting on the couch and watching a movie. Other married couples might enjoy going on hikes with one another. No matter how busy you or your partner are, be sure to set aside some quality time for one another.