The stereotypical meddling, overbearing in-laws, is an unfortunate reality for many a spouse. Because the way we were raised is different, and the dynamics of our homes are different, it’s bound to happen that it takes time to get to know our in-laws and for them to get to know you. Sometimes, a lucky few strike the jackpot and get in-laws who are loving and supportive and who accept you with open arms.
Here are some signs that should show you that you have awesome in-laws:
- Your in-laws think you’re awesome
When your in-laws accept you as a member of the family and treat you like a second set of parents who think you’re wonderful, you’ve got it made. That acceptance means you’re free to be yourself and expect no judgment, just as your spouse and his/her siblings are.
- They are on-hand to help when you need it
Awesome in-laws always turn up for you in a pinch. If you know, you can call your in-laws in the middle of the night, and they’ll come over to help because one of your children is sick and your spouse is away, your in-laws are in love with you.
- They offer advice but don’t impose it on you
If you’re in a sticky situation and you need some advice, you and your spouse should be able to go to your in-laws for help. For bad in-laws, this is the perfect chance to interfere. But great in-laws will offer advice, and not be offended if you choose to solve the problem differently
- They make the most of the holidays
In-laws who welcome you into the family fold will make sure you are made to feel comfortable during the holidays, especially when your family is far away, have accepted you as one of their own. This is something to be treasured. A lot of your friends, dread spending the holidays with their in-laws because they make life so difficult.
- They are impartial
When you and your spouse disagree, and you need some relationship advice, your first port of call should be your in-laws. After all, who knows your spouse better than they do? How your in-laws respond in the situation defines just what kind of people they are. In-laws who are impartial and who can accept their child’s shortcomings give good advice and are there for you when you need them.
- They love family get-togethers
If your in-laws enjoy showing you naked baby pictures and high school yearbook photos of your spouse, it means they want to you to know their history because they want you to be part of your future. If they enjoy spending their free time with you over the weekend but know not to overcrowd you, they’re the kind of in-laws most of us just dream about.
- They understand their roles and responsibilities
Great in-laws know what they need to do and when to do it to build good relationships. They understand and respect boundaries. If they cross boundaries, you can address the matter with them courteously. They make their boundaries clear to you, and if you cross them, the deal with it in an appropriate way.
- Your in-laws accept your whole family
Sometimes the idea of introducing your family to your in-laws can be daunting. What if Uncle Jack is not on his best behavior on the day? What if your mother-in-law doesn’t like your mother? Good in-laws accept your family for who they are and understand that without them you wouldn’t be here to make their child so happy.
- They address conflict responsibly
When a conflict situation arises, meddling in-laws regard it as the perfect opportunity to fight dirty and get as many digs in as possible. Good in-laws address conflict with grown-up dignity and do not use degrading language, swearing, and name-calling to resolve disputes.