When you get married, you take the leap because you believe in your relationship and you believe enough in it to make a long-term commitment. There are some basic rules about how to create and maintain a solid, happy and long-lasting relationship.
A marriage is like every other kind of partnership and in order to survive it needs to be treated with the same rules of any other kind of relationship. The most basic universal rule for a functional marriage is respect.
You chose this person to be your partner. If you don’t respect them, then you shouldn’t be in a partnership with them. Having respect for a person means that there should be a good level of trust between you. You should have a solid enough level of trust that you can be honest enough to be able to talk honestly.
Honesty is a basic tenant of respect and its one of the most important needs in a marriage. Without honesty in your relationship, you will find it hard to get to know each other. A good partnership is based on complicity and honesty. Here are seven simple rules for honesty in your marriage.
- Make honesty easy
Your partner is just that, a partner, you should be able to tell them stuff. You should have a level of trust that allows you to tell them anything. That level of trust is what makes for a good relationship.
- Be a team
Having a partnership makes life so much easier to deal with. You should be able to continuously negotiate the terms with complete honesty knowing that both your needs will eventually be met. You are both growing and changing, keep your partner updated.
- Make your rules together
Chose how you want your relationship together. Be clear to each other about what you are both committing to and then honor those rules. Decisions made together are for the good of the couple, rather than the individual, that way they will respect both of your needs.
- Honor your decisions
If you have made decisions that reflect you each individually and as a couple, then stick to them. If you find that in this moment of your life and growth some part of these rules or decisions is not right for you, then discuss it with your partner. Honesty means being able to talk and renegotiate if you need to, but it also means upholding your decisions.
- Be honest about the rules
Unrealistic rules are setting you up for failure. When you make your decisions make sure that what you are setting up is feasible. A relationship is a partnership, and like any agreement that you enter into, you only enter into it, if you can uphold the agreement. You wouldn’t sign a bank loan if you knew the terms were unrealistic, so why enter into a marriage agreement if you can see that it won’t work.
- Be honest about money
Talk about money. Decide together how you are going to handle money. You are in a partnership. You are both working together for the same result, a happy and well-functioning marriage. Money is one of the most difficult things to handle in a marriage. If you are working together at being in a marriage, then the money is part of the partnership. Take a long hard look at your views on money and how to handle money as a couple. This can make or break your relationship.
- Never ever cheat
Being honest in a relationship means building up a level of trust. Being in a relationship means you have made a commitment to each other. If this commitment for some reason is no longer valid, then be honest about it. Annul the agreement and then do what you need to do.